i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Randomize
