They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Randomize
