So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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