I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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