I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
