Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
