The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
