she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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