Your dad touched me again.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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