I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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