You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
