i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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