i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
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