Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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