my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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