she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
