So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize