Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
