i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
