Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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