my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
