he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
