Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
