Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
