Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize