I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i just had sex bonerless
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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