this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
this beer tastes like vomit already
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Randomize