nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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