had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
