So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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