idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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