His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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