the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
It's never too late to be topless.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
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