OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
