So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
