Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
