it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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