Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
