Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize
