I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize