Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize