He felt like a one man threesome
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
