You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I FOUND THE LEGS
There are leaves in my underwear?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
