You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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