I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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