What did we do last night that was yellow?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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