I want to walk on stilts...naked
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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