My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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