hotel room ftw
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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