what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize